Finally you’ve been able to find a few days to go on vacation, invest in your relationship and rekindle your romance.
But reality teaches us that the stress accumulated over time and suppressed between the couple breaks free on the first available opportunity – your vacation. What can you do to avoid arguments and fights? Here are three efficient and worthwhile suggestions to facilitate communication during your vacation.
Make talking a routine
The best way to avoid fights on your vacation is to have your arguments as part of your daily routine. Don’t let it build up inside, don’t suppress it or sweep it under the rug. If something bothers you, find the right time to share it with your partner and talk it over calmly and gently as part of your routine.
Find the Right Way to Discuss Things
If you are still keeping a lot inside, and during your vacation you suddenly feel the stress and anger intensifying but you’ve been continuing to hide it – let it out. Tell your partner what is on your heart – but do it in the right manner. What does that mean?
Interpersonal communication theories claim that you can say anything on your mind; it’s just a matter of how you say it. If you explode and blame your partner with barbed criticism – it is most likely that he or she will get into a defensive position or attack in turn. From here to an unbreakable cycle of anger the road is very short. Try to say things in a more pleasant manner, and focus not on what your partner is doing wrong, but how you feel. Instead of saying: “You are indifferent, you don’t care about me and always leave the dishes for me to clean,” you can say: “When you don’t wash the dishes or come home late from work, it makes me feel very unimportant”. Discussing your emotions is better than blaming one another and your message will pass in a gentle and acceptable manner, which will make your partner more attentive to you.
Use touch, hugs, kisses, holding hands or caresses – these are amazing ways of calming anger. It won’t work automatically when you are at the peak of your anger, but it is definitely a technique worth trying.
If you have started a conversation on what bothers you, try touching each other, although at the moment it will feel less natural. But this way you can remember how much you love one another, even if you are angered or frustrated.